Deciding between individual therapy and couples therapy can feel confusing—especially if you’re going through a tough time and aren’t sure what kind of support you need.
This guide is designed to help you better understand the key differences between the two and offer some helpful questions to reflect on as you consider what’s best for you.
What is Individual Therapy?
Individual therapy is a one-on-one space where you meet with a therapist (either in person or virtually) to focus on your personal mental health, emotional wellbeing, and/or self-exploration. While you may explore relationships with others during these sessions, the space is intended to focus on you as the client.
When to Choose Individual Therapy
Individual therapy may be a good fit if:
- The primary issue or challenge you’re experiencing is related to your individual experience or suffering.
- You’re experiencing symptoms of depression, anxiety, trauma, or other emotional concerns.
- You want to better understand yourself, your thoughts, or your behaviors.
- You’re navigating identity, self-worth, or confidence issues.
- You would like to explore your relationships with others across many different contexts (e.g., romantic, friendships, family).
- You’re in a relationship, but:
- Your partner is unwilling to attend couples therapy.
- You feel emotionally or physically unsafe.
- You’re not ready to involve your partner in the therapeutic process.
What is Couples Therapy?
Couple’s therapy focuses on the health of your relationship, including how you communicate with one another, manage conflict, and connect as partners. In this format, both partners attend therapy together (either in person or virtually) to work on shared issues–such as communication, conflict, intimacy, or trust. Different from individual therapy, the space is intended to focus on the relationship as the client. At times, you may also have one-on-one sessions with your couple’s therapist. These sessions allow you to share your individual perspective and allow your therapist to identify any individual issues that may impact the couple’s work.
When to Choose Couples Therapy
Couples therapy may be a good fit if:
- The primary issue is between you and your partner and the relationship suffering—such as recurring arguments, communication breakdowns, or trust issues.
- You want to improve your emotional or physical intimacy.
- You’re navigating a life transition together (new baby, move, kids leaving the home, etc.).
- You want to set or work toward shared goals as a couple.
- You both recognize that your relationship is struggling and want to learn how to better understand and support one another.
Still Not Sure? Questions to Guide Your Decision-Making
- What are the main challenges I am experiencing?
- Are these challenges more about my individual emotions and experiences? Or about my relationship?
- Are the patterns I’m noticing showing up across multiple relationships? Or just the one with my partner?
- What do I hope therapy can help me achieve?
Can I Do Both Individual and Couples Therapy?
Yes. At times, choosing both couples therapy and individual therapy can be beneficial and appropriate. This allows you to:
- Work through personal issues in individual therapy
- Address relational dynamics in couples therapy
- Explore how individual experiences may be affecting your relationship (and vice versa)
If you pursue both, it can be helpful for your individual and couples therapists to collaborate (with your consent) to ensure a coordinated and supportive approach.
Making the Right Choice for You
Even after reading this, you might still feel unsure. That’s okay and perfectly normal. Therapy is deeply personal, and the right path forward isn’t always obvious. If you’re stuck, consider reaching out to a trusted therapist or therapy practice. They can offer guidance based on your unique circumstances and help you decide where to begin. And remember, starting with one type of therapy doesn’t mean you’re locked in. Many people move between individual and couples therapy depending on their needs. Your therapist can support you through that process, wherever you begin.
